Monday, 3 August 2015

True Detective - S2 E7 - Black Maps and Motel Rooms

The detectives flee into hiding following the orgy. Meanwhile, Semyon attempts to get to the bottom of his financial collapse.

Spoilers after the jump.

I usually pride myself on picking up the silly insignificant details of intricate plot points and background characters so it's troubling that I had no idea what the fuck was going on at any point in this episode. Rather than the show being too complicated to follow, I am putting it down to the show not being interesting enough to follow. If I cared about anything I was watching on screen I would probably understand it all and see the bigger picture. I had to go find a summary of events online to figure it all out and since you're probably also in the dark, I'll do my best to explain.

Woodrugh and Velcoro figure out from studying the contracts that Osip is in league wit a bunch of Vinci city power brokers to take control of the city from the Mayor. Naturally, this leads them to the conclusion that Caspere, together with a few other police, robbed the blue diamonds from a family in 1992 and used the money from their sale to buy their way into power. One of the orphans from the robbed family grew into a super stealthy avenging angel of fury and killed Caspere. Somehow they figured this out from their visit to the movie set, a scene I most certainly recall having happened. It definitely occurred, I just don't remember anyhting else about it.

The real police apparently figured that part out long before our useless detectives did and knowing how inept they were, put them on the case to figure out 'the truth' which was a truth they invented to cover up the original diamond theft. I'm sure they would've gotten away with it too if something which I'm sure was incredibly contrived that I don't remember hadn't happened.

So, we're clear now? Not really? Let's dive into the action anyway. Bezzerides and Velcoro are both in hiding. For Bezzerides this is particularly perplexing because all she did was get sprayed in the face with a mystery drug whereas Velcoro went out the night before on a whiskey, cocaine and hookers bender and was absolutely fine the next day. Is the show trying to suggest that the female constitution is not on par with a guy's? How sexist!

They're both wanted for murder, Ani for the security guard at the orgy which is ridiculous because first of all how did they know that was even her and secondly, why are you calling attention to your orgy? I guess you have the PD in your pocket but even so. Velcoro is framed for the murder of Brianna Barksdale which is also kinda silly because if you took her out, why not just take him out too? You knew that they'd be meeting there at that time so you could've just taken him out of the picture there and then. Everyone knows he has a whiskey, cocaine and hookers problem so it wouldn't be a stretch to make it look like he went crazy and pulled a murder-suicide.

Instead, he's still alive and on the loose in time for the finale next week at which point he'll take out at least one of these puppeteers on his way out the door. Just stupid. Then of course, with all these similar circumstances and Bezzerides' having to send her family away for fear of reprisals with all the emotion that brings and the repressed molestation from her youth which her father totally had a part in no matter what the actual canon of the show dictates, of course, Bezzerides and Velcoro hook up, an event I predicted and feared from the very first episode of this season. Could it have been any more telegraphed? Nic Pizzolato, you suck.

Meanwhile, although I think we have just about figured out who Stan is, I'm not sure I really know who Blake is. I mean, we've seen him around and know he does stuff but he is definitely not someone I thought I was meant to paying attention to. Or maybe I just wasn't paying attention to the show in general? In the least surprising plot turn ever, Semyon is able to extract from him that he has been in Osip's pocket the whole time and Osip has moved in and taken over all of Frank's interests. I sure hope Frank realized this sooner than now or that would make him an even crappier gangster than what we already thought.

Supposedly Osip is planning to displace the Mayor of Vinci and replace him with his son who he will better be able to control. Is this the son who was all tatted up and talked like a wanksta? I'm not sure the voting public will go for that, but good luck. When Osip arrives to claim his kingdom, Frank is humble and accepting of his fate but already has his exit strategy mapped out, firing his clubs and planning to hit a cash exchange between Osip and the Mayor. Perhaps he can help his old buddy Ray out one last time too. Although he is not very good at scheming, I think the guy writing this show thinks he is, so he will probably come out on the other side of the finale alive and well.

One guy who definitely won't is poor Paul Woodrugh, RIP. It looks like he is for real dead rather than fake out shot like Velcoro in episode two. I guess he is not the crow after all? Because he is a dumbass and a terrible detective, he didn't shut the curtains when he was having his secret rendezvous with Tony Bravo. Or maybe he is just very romantic and wanted to kiss while by the window next to the moonlight and the hollering corner boys? Whatever the case is, he is now being blackmailed.

Again, because he is an idiot he goes to the secret meeting with the blackmailer who turns out to be the chief of police which of course I didn't realize until the episode had ended - I spent the whole time thinking, well it seems as though I'm supposed to remember who this person is? I remembered him in the end, it's just that as with so much else this season, it was never really properly explained or established. After making a half-hearted offer to flip on his friends, he attempts to escape and chickens out of killing his antagonist the way he should have done.

Woodrugh has time for one last moronic play, failing to check his srurroundings and breaking into a casual stroll as he leaves the building from which he was meant to be fleeing and his promptly shot in the back of the head. How did this guy ever survive being in an actual freaking war? Meanwhile, because she is psychic or something, his baby mama knows that he got axed and starts to tear up. Or more likely, she was in it all along which makes my brain hurt because other than being a beard, she was so insignificant and she would be the only person he would be willing to be blackmailed for? I swear, this show is sillier than Bachelor in Paradise.

Finale next week, thankfully. Rachel McAdams can get back to working on projects of legitimate substance. Here's how I see things playing out. Ray dyes his hair blond as a disguise while Semyon pulls off the raid on Osip and uses the cash to buy a sweet ride. He picks his wife, Ray and Ani and they drive off to Venezuela together posing as a folk singing group from Sale Lake City leaving the mess in Vinci behind forever hopefully with none of us ever to return. Here is my visual proof of this.

"True Detective" airs Sundays on HBO at 9:00pm EST.

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